butterfly~

i had an interesting time this past week... went to places i didn't think i'd go, met lots of new ppl... it was a cool experience, n i enjoyed myself~

new year's in like 2 days.. i haven't made any plans or resolutions, just gonna take it as it comes like i would every other year... and like every other year, this one's pretty much the same... nothin unique about it, nothin outstanding... come to think about it, this year's been pretty bad.. dropped outta sch, the whole stabbing thing...

i dont feel that the new year's goin to change anything.. never did feel the "magic" in the anticipation of a new year... cept in 2000 when the whole Y2K thing was goin on.. but when the clock struck midnight n the bombs didn't go off, it became just another normal year.... but wadever right~

i had 4 dinners this night... mom cooked the 1st, had maggi noodles an hr later, left over food from yesterday, then ordered mcdonalds 2 hrs later... i wanted to win that 10 grand from the ring & win thing... but who was i kiddin~

"I Am Legend" was a cool, haven't seen a good movie in a long time.... it was refreshing~ not the typical gunz ablazin' zombie horror flick, it was very emotionally drivin... so yeah, i liked it alot... maybe i'll go download some bob marley songs from the movie.... maybe not~



"I promised a friend I would say hello to you today..."










"hello..."

bitter grounds~

i didn't have a very good day the other day... got a msg from one of my colleges sayin the starhub job is cancelled... so i dont have a job no more, which definatly blows... everyone went down to the place to ask for explainations n compensations.. it was ugly~

all our plans were pretty much ruined... so much for that~ then i heard gynn got into a car accident and hurt her back, it wasn't tat serious but still~ met up for dinner at pizza hut, on the way there some deuchbag burnt my finger with his cigarette bud by accident, i already wasn't in a good mood then....

but dinner was cool, got a nice window seat to look out of.. and the conversation was nice... it's been awhile since i had a decent one~ She also introduced me to a job at Candy Empire~ lots of sweet girls hang out at candy shops, so tat'll be cool~


i dropped my ear stud down the sink when i took it out at home... as if my luck wasn't already bad.... it was like a final "F you" from 'the man' before he left me alone-_-


wadever~

20/12/2007~

my mom, pounced onto my bed this morning to wake me up... she said something i couldnt really make out since i was still driftin in n out of it, but the only thing i remembered from it was tat it was loud... my mom's has those kinda loud-sounding voices that even if she whipsered, u could still hear it... n u know how sensitive ur eyes and ears are to light n sound in the morning, not cool -_-

she'd be all, "get up aaron... *something something~"
then i'd just cover my head with the sheets n tell her i dont wanna go to sch -_-~

after awhile, she gave up n went to do the same thing at my sister's room... i could hear them talking n moving around.. it was noisy n it made me feel really unnerving... & just like that, my morning was ruined~

i hate being woken up unaturally.... well, not really 'unnaturally' more like unexpectedly... like if i had to get up at 6am the next morning, i'd set my alarm, n i'd wake up... i'll be tired, but i knew i had to wake up.. so in tat sense, im not disturbed.. and i luv starting the day that way~

but today i woke up to the sounds of the mother n sister's chatter n gossip as they watched their korean shows in the living room.... & with the volume so loud, i could hear every word spoken by the actors... every flamboyant tone used to express that incomprehensible tongue of theirs... the ching-ness was seeping into my room n crawling up the pillars of my bed, poking n proding at my tolerence to it... n tat was it, got up... n scowled at them on the way to the bathroom~

they didnt seem to care...
n neither did i once i made it to the bathroom~

it was cold... n it was awesome..... i luv morning rains, so much so tat i'd wake up to experience it rather then sleep thru its comfort~ which was why i was glad i was awake....

spent most of the afternoon readin my comics n savin the world~(of warcraft)... theres alotta movies i wanna watch... old one and new....

-Batman the Dark knight
-I am Legend
-American Gangster

and all those foreign films i always wanted to watch but cant find.... the internet's an amazing tool :)

dinner the night b4 was fish n potatos~
i underestimated the amount of mashed potatos, 3 potatos could make.. that portion's probably onli 1/2 of a potato~
which remains me, i gotta get a potato masher gizmo thingy~


nice lil lemon to top it off with too~
n i ate it at 9pm when everyone was still at work n i lit candles n shit while watchin an episode of Grey's anatomy i taped the night b4~

i love having the whole house to myself.. unfortunate today everyone's home.... apparently its a public holiday today... still dont know which one though~

you put the lime in the coke n u drink it all together....
i put the lemon in the coke n it just tastes sour -_-

the cave~

spagetti n meat balls... again, it tastes great, cause i made it.. and everyone knows, anything u make by yrself will always look n taste good... & it actually doesnt look tat bad compared to the grey chicken from the other day... plus those meatballs are handmade too... not some canned one... wait, do meatballs even come in cans?


-------------------------

cleared my room the other day... took off everything from the shelves n drawers... even unplugged sephira~ and the fan too to give'em a wipe... sweeped n mopped.. dusted n cleaned everything... changed the sheets, made the bed... tossed out all the crap i didnt want n re-organized all the crap i did~

took like 3 hrs but it felt accomplishing... my room was clean :)

should've taken a 'before' picture, but i dont think u'd wanna see that...

And check out all the comics i got, i forgot how many i actually owned... this is like 3 drawers n a "portable-cabinet-from-under-the-bed" full of'em~


i was super proud of my collection back in the day,when ppl would ask...
"so wad's ur hobbby aaron?"
then i'd tell'em...
"i collect comics~"
"oh, u mean manga?"
"last time i checked, Batman was from Gotham, not Tokyo -_-"

n i had a kick ass collection of comics.. from the popular X-men & Spider-man to Ninja Turtles & Archie... then there were just weird ones~

n here are a couple of the First Issues..
1st issue of AquaMan, 1st issue of X-Force, 1st X-FActor, 1st Ultimate X-men, 1st issue of Archie & Friends paperback edition~


i bet it'll be worth alotta money if i sell everything... n i think i should since i read them all n i dont really have much space to keep'em in~ but then again, i dunno if i'd have the heart to sell them... or if ppl still wanna buy stuff like this... hu cares about the x-men when u got an x-box 360~

anyway, my room is super clean now, im not letting anyone step into it n touch my stuff~ not even family or friends... untill it gets dirty again, then yeah, mi kasa su kasa~

then u can go roll around on my bed or wadever, i wouldn't care~

so yeah.. too cool for sch so im stayin home~

nothing, like something, happens everywhere~

there was a documentary last night on arts central about the Davinci Code, and it got me all thinkin about god, and religion~ so i went n googled the whole conspiracy theory thing to decide for myself whether or not any of this was real...

there was pages upon pages of historical fact and speculations... words like the "Priory of Sion" & "Opus Dei" popped up alot... analytic references on how Mary Magdalne was the real 'Holy Grail', not to mention all critizim on whether or not there was some eliged secret msg in his painting of 'The Last Supper'~

i skimmed thru all of tat, & more... but i didnt understand anything~ i guess since im not really a religious person, i dont have much background knowledge to compare anything to~ but it was still pretty interesting... so i went n googled other stuff about Anthropology...

and, as i went on, going from page to page, clickin on link upon link... i noticed that a majority of all the content was mainly theoretical~ it was just, speculation upon speculation... & afterall, there was no REAL right or wrong ans, it was just made up of ppl's different opinions and idealogies of different situations, depending on wadever the subject at hand was~

like the Law for example, it wasn't just one guy that made up all the rules... it was a grp of ppl.. a majority, that sat down n decided wad was right n wad was wrong... and it keeps adjusting as the times change, as currency and culture alters~

but tat doesnt make it flawless, it changes, but it doesnt improve... at least not drastically~ i would say that the study of humanities rely mostly on culture to determine its next move... wad would be considered acceptable then, might not be said the same now... whether or not wad music is 'cool', or wad is considered as Art was probably percived in a different way in, in a different civilization of a different time~

and it wasn't just about our diversities, there was more too it... something bigger... there was space and the stars, Genetics and behavior~ Collaborating with cultural significance, the natural & social science of humans have purpose & intent to unlocking wad we as human beings really are..

Is it wad u do that defies us as individuals? most of us would like to believe that... but wad if it's not? wad if destiny was conceivable? wad if fate was in play? would we even be able to comprehend such an allegation?

hu's to say its not, n if so, hu's to deprive us of knowing it? Who's to say that we dont have the right to know the meaning behind our existance... wad if aliens really existed? if u knew the answer, would u tell everyone? afterall, ppl have the right to know... hu's to say anything about anyone?

this reminded me of a conversation i had with vic, about why Wars were started... which then lead to a deliberation on President Bush's administration and ended with an indept disscusion on Hitler's life as a child~

anyway, the point being, had different choices been made, had President Bush chose Not to retaliate agains the 911 attack, would Americans still be protesting FOR the war instead? i mean, i'd be pissed if the goverment doesnt do anything when my country's attacked.... or would they be content with the decision of peace? had 911 not even occur, would there still be terrorism? if Hitler didnt start WWII, would the world be a better place? or would some other conflict just take its place?

is it really fate that lead to these events? is it destiny? were these event inevitable? or were they all simply just moments of bad decisions making?

which ever side u choose to believe in, there'll always be a moment where we'd decided that, 'hey... maybe there is some unknown force tellin me wad to do'.. but then again, maybe there isn't~

knowing all this just makes u see how trival the problems in our lifes are... if u got a "D-" for ur math quiz, if the person u like doesnt like u back...

so wad... is that something to cry over? perhaps... is it something to die over?.. hardly~ compared to the world n its mysteries, our personal problems are insignificant because we dont realise wad goes on outside of our lil lives.. how could we?~

n its ok tat we cant... maybe we're not suppose to~ we already have such a hard time dealing with our own problems, let alone everyone else's... so, if the girl i like doesnt like me back, so wad... sure i'd feel sad n disappoint n wad not... but knowing how big the world is makes it seem manageable...

then the problem doesnt seem so big anymore...

which is just fine~

dinner~

INGREDIENTS
1/2 cup cornstarch
1/4 cup water
1 1/2 teaspoons minced garlic
1 1/2 teaspoons minced fresh ginger root (didn't have ginger...)
3/4 cup white sugar
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/4 cup white wine vinegar
1/2 cup hot chicken broth
1 teaspoon MSG
3 pounds skinless, boneless chicken breast halves, cut into bite size pieces
1/2 cup soy sauce
1 teaspoon ground white pepper
1 egg
1 cup vegetable oil
2 cups chopped green onions (didn't know onions were green...)
16 chilli peppers, sun-dried (didn't have those either...)

DIRECTIONS
1.
To Make Sauce: In a large bowl combine 1/2 cup cornstarch and 1/4 cup water. Mix together. Add garlic, ginger, sugar, 1/4 cup soy sauce and white wine vinegar. Then add chicken broth and monosodium glutamate and stir all together until sugar dissolves. Refrigerate until needed.

2.
To Prepare Chicken: In a separate bowl, combine chicken, 1/2 cup soy sauce and white pepper. Stir in egg. Add 1 cup cornstarch and stir until chicken is evenly coated. Add oil to help separate chicken pieces. Divide chicken into small quantities and deep fry at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) until crispy. Drain on paper towels.

3.
To Make Mixture: Place a small amount of oil in wok and heat until wok is hot. Add scallions and dried chile peppers and stir-fry briefly. Remove sauce from refrigerator and stir. Add sauce to wok. Then add fried chicken and cook until sauce thickens (add cornstarch or water as needed until sauce is as thick as you like it).

got this recipe from allrecipes.com~
its suppose to look like this....

but it turned out like this...


tastes great though, cause i made it... so yeah~

good to be a bachelor, cept i gotta pretend no one's around me to fully enjoy the whole "living on my own" thing~


wadever...

fragile things~

wow, i totally love the weather in demember... the rain blocks out most of the sunlight in the morning so it doesnt glare much into my window.. makes the day feel like evening... which is really cool~

the sister came back... mom went to get her at the airport this morning at like 6am. but all she brought back was some candy bars... kinda lame since u went all the way to America n all u got was candy, but it was special candy.. from america.. wooooo~

i especially like the milk duds~ n the candy box with my name on it...

plus there was this... so guess it wasnt tat bad :)

she sleepin on my bed behind me now.. which is weird cause i dont like her touchin my stuff... but wadever~ cause im nice n all...

wadever~

my neighbour's daughter is kinda cute lookin... i dont really see her much cause i usually dont care~ but i passed her in the corridor the other night, n she gave me a lil smile.. it was the clearest i've seen her face n she looked pretty sweet~

imma go say hello next time if we bump into each other again... wonder how she sounds like in person~

monday's probably gonna be the last free day im gonna get till march... but everyone's in sch or at attachment, so i guess i'll just bumm at home~ but its cool... weather's nice~

imma stop here, headin out in abit...
so yeah~ happy sunday

flash backs n premenitions~

had dinner with Gynn at blk 85 a couple of nights ago.. it was cool, i missed the bcm~ then the next day we went shoppin... and she paid for everything so yayy~ lunch was cool even though we left like so many garlic bread uneaten... tcc was cool too.. i was gonna take u to the four seasons for dinner next time but u kept punching me n pinched my arm... so im not going to anymore!

tell the coin bomohs to curse me why dont u -_-~

---------------------

the sister called this morning from Las Vegas when i was still alseep, said it was scary over there n her hotel was haunted... that she was sick of burgers for breakfast n there was no chilli sauce there-_-

Nirvada is a scary place, we've all seen CSI havent we... the crimerate is high... i mean, alot of things can go wrong if u put a whole bunch of casinos in one place... just be careful, dont be an easy target.. walk tall and have one hand in ur coat pocket to act like ur packin heat n everything will be cool~

as for the ghostly hotel, how many times have we heard stories of ppl going oversea n staying in a haunted hotel, while when we stay in a local hotel, nothin happens... its just our insecurities of being in a foreign land thats playin tricks on our minds... its just like moving into a new house, the anxiety of being in an unfamilar place can lead to paranoia... its just ur sub-concious mind thinkin that theres someone watchin u from the window when in reality we're just scared to be alone~

so dearest sister, read a book, listen to music, just be cool... there are no ghosts in america, onli angels.... stop worrying urself by watchin the news all the time n scarying urself... bad shit happens, but life goes on~ keep the bible by the bed side n go get some mace tomoro or something... then buy me a cool t-shirt and booze when u get to the airport~

open ur mind n just enjoy the last few days there, cause once u get back home dim sum n kuey kuey is all ur gonna eat... spend all ur money, go shopping, go see a movie, go to a bar... just spend all ur money n have a good time~ america's the land of the free n ur can do wadever u want...

vandalise something, leave ur mark... in the hotel, on a park bench... take photos of random things... of random ppl... oh, n get me a stack of the their local press.. i wanna see how their paper looks like.... talk to strangers, they wont find it weird.. ask if u have a Qs, or if ur just bored~

oh, n write a jorunal... that always helps....
thats about all the advice i can give... email me if u cant get thru on the phone~

as told by the brother~
(i luv u cause i have to... but sometimes cause i want to~)

for the kids~

mom asked me wad i wanted to eat for breakfast this morning... so i told her i wanted "a patty... a crabby patty..." then i just laughed my ass off while she continued watchin tv~

lol

----------------

anyway, saturday was pretty interesting~
vic's dad was part of this Charity organization n they'd planned this thing to bring a bunch of sick kids to watch "Scrooge the musical" down at the Singapore Repotory Theatre~ so i just went to help... thats right, me... doing charity.... didnt think i would bother about doing shit like this now did u... but im capable of performing good deeds, so there~


didnt really do much... all we had to do was usher the kids into the theatre.... they came by the bus loads, one after the other.... i'd figured the kids would all be like... bald and pale-lookin from all the chemo, commin out in wheelchairs with tubes in their arms n shit... but it was nothin like that...

they were all, jumpy and runnnin around all over the place with their power ranger backpacks... they seemed happy enough considering they were suppose to be sick~ even though they were holdin hands with their partners and lined up in a row, they were still jumpin around and wavin their hands about... one of them shot me with his finger, another bowed to me and said "thank u very much" like i was a prince or something.. they were just being kids, & it was really cute to watch~



once tat was done, me n vic didnt really wanna stay to watch the show, so we went to PS for dinner, then walked back... there were alot of ppl in PS... there was a live battle of the bands thing goin on outside, then a 'Winx Club' show goin on on the inside... so all the lil kids n parents were inside while the emo ppl flocked the outside~ point being, there were lots of ppl at PS....

there were lots of stuff to see in the theatre... lots of paintings n shit... and there was a alfresco bar at the back so tat was cool~




so when the show was over and all the kids came out, we had to give each of'em a goodie bag...


kids are like lil monsters... they grab shit n run around alot.. the non-sick kids were the meanest actually... friggin grabbed everything from my hand... it was the actual sick kids tat were nice and polite, saying thank you and smiling alot... especially this one girl hu had down syndrome hu didnt really say thank you out loud, she just mouthed it to me...

now, i wasnt really expecting anything when i came here, i figured "yeah, i got some time to kill... sure, lets go help some sick kids.. there might be some chickas there too.." but that girl made me feel really good about myself... i kinda understand the whole jizz of helping the needy... it felt good :)

annnyway... one by one the kiddies all left... n it was just us helpers, a couple of adults, and us young ppl~ one of the girls went up to me n said something to me in ching, i didnt really know wth she just said... plus she had her cellphone to her ear so i didnt know if she was talkin to me or not~ but she was lookin at me when she said it... then her friend said something in ching too, & from wad i managed to decifer, she said something like " i had alot of question marks on my head "

apparently cellphone girl was askin for something in one of my goodie bags... n when i just stared at her cluelessly, cellphone girl's friend laughed n said the "he looks like he's got alot of question marks on his head" thing~

so yeah, it was just a simple enough situation that happened in less than a min... but it stuck with me cause, i felt weird not being able to relate to them... n everyone speaks like that in this country... sure i can speak english very well... but sometimes its just cool to fit in~

i find it hard to relate with most ppl cause their so different in terms of language n culture~ theres onli a hand full of ppl that i can be on the same lvl with when it comes to conversation~

so we hitched a ride on one of vic's dad's friends's van... which had a couch at the back of it, which was pretty awesome... it was the 1st time i sat in a sofa in a moving vehicle, felt like a video game...

so yeah, thats it...
dont know how to end it, so im just gonna stop~



*stops

December in chair~

i love my mornings~
i love waking up in the December weather to an empty house...
Everyone's never home in the mornings... n i love it~

i love the privacy, the quietness... i love how no one's in the kitchen cookin or in the living room watchin tv... i love the stillness~

its serene and motionless... i like how i get 1st dibs on everything n not having to share it with anyone else... (food, hotwater in the bathroom, etc) but its not really wad i can DO but more of how i feel when im all alone in an empty house~

n i feel calm, safe... & it gives me hope for some reason... that today will be a good day, and if it didnt turn out tat well, there's always the next quiet morning i can wake up too....

and its nice knowing that~

---------------------

this whole week's been a whole 'runnin around' session to get my affairs in order n still balance work at the same time.... my 2nd job starts on the 4th of Dec, i gotta report to some place in Cuppage Road... where the hell is tat?

im so busy now.. its crazy... a couple of weeks ago i was just bummin around at home playin video games n watchin tv... now im going to like 2 places in one day...

im tired... and sometimes i miss school... the friends, the classes.... fooling around without a care in the world~ workin life really blows, but i feel alot more grown up.. i feel like, the choices i make now hold greater effect then the ones that did before... and because of that, the wrong choices bear larger consiquences~

oh, and another thing...
accents are such turn ons~ i say that, all the time... and its true : ) i was havin a pretty bad day at work last night, till this girl introduced herself to me.. and she had the sweetest voice i've heard in a long time... i could'nt really tell if she had an accent, but the tone of her voice made me feel really tingly inside : )

hearing her speak made me wanna talk to her even more... i asked more questions just to get to hear her voice... she had a really nice name too.. it was unique, and that just added to her feminineness~

but it was short-lived, i was busy and she had her affairs to attend to... perhaps in another place, at another time i might have gotten her no. or something... nonetheless, meeting her really made my day... n after that i got a piece of a bday cake from one of the customers cause i did a good job attending to them~

so yeah.... women are truly astonishing creatures~
especially the sweet sounding articulate ones : )

really cool~

i say the word "cool" alot... i use it to describe almost every positive thing i experience~ i usually subsitute it with words like "nice" and "okay".... the word "cool" is my own imperative verb that i use to express almost every aspect of a situation that i happen to encounter~

so yeah, thats pretty cool : )

i havent blogged in a long time, & i wouldnt say that much has happend.... but its been a cool week~ i went to changi with remi for dinner about a week ago, and i found out that changi is actually pretty fucked up with all its haunted old japanese schools n abandoned WWII training camps... not to mention all the hotspots that the trannies go to... we drove around, n he showed me this grave thing on the top of a spooky flight of stairs in the middle of this jungle area... he called it the "stairway to hell" it was creepy.. n we took lots of photos but he still hasnt sent them to me -_- so, cant really show them to u...

the sister flew off to Las Vegas this afternoon to some seminar there.... im totally jealous of her.... and its like 10 degrees down there so she got herself a coat n stole my beanie~ and DAMN i love wearing coats....

i dont really love coats, i just love the Idea of wearing one and walkin around in the cold with ur hands in those warm pockets and having flakes of snow get caught on the fur while ur walkin thru the chilling streets.... i love the idea of putting one on when u leave a building n hanging it up when u enter one... i love coat hangers too~ and its like the 1st thing i'd buy for my future home in The Hamptons in 10 or 20 years from now~

and its her birthday today too... -_- wad better present can u get then a free trip to LV on ur bday~ i told her to take acouple of photos with Elvis and buy a "I went to Las Vegas & all i got was this lousy T-shirt" t-shirt when she gets back...

mom's thinkin of quittin her job cause i dont think she's havin a good time there, so i gonna try n take up 2 jobs now tat i got so much free time n all.. and i do have, oh so much free time -_-~

lets see.. wad else is there....

i used to listen to alot of modern rock stuff from the chill peppers & Foo fighters, then i went to modern contemporary like Keane and James Morrison... after that i was more into Indie and listened to alot of The Killers & The Bravery.. but now im back to contemporary again... with alot of Amos lee and a hint of rock from Sterophonics and Lifehouse...

and, with all this talk about music, i've realised tat i havent touch my guitar in mths & i've forgotten how to play almost everything -_-
but wadever....

im watchin this thing on tv now... some concert on S-pop on channel U. Dont even ask me why im watching it... i just happend to chance upon it and was gonna immediatly change the channel.... but on hearing all the fuss about the whole s-pop shit, i decided to keep an open mind n see wad its about~

its really weird actually... everything about it was soo "chingy" it kinda creeped me out a lil... the elaborate, yet typical, poofy outfits that they wore, the heavy make-up and overly defined eyeshadow... and then there were all these screaming fans with the same mullet hair style that every ching chong chang girl had in this country waving their big ass posters about n screaming at every single development in the show, significant or not~

it was like this...
pop star comes on (*fans scream)
pop star waves at them (*fans scream)
pop star puts hand on mic (*fans scream)
pop star begins intro to song (*fans scream)
pop star sings song (*fans scream)
pop star sings chorus (*fans scream)
pop star ends song (*fans scream)
pop star leaves stage (*fans scream)
pop star turns around n flips everyone off (*fans scream)
pop star pulls out semi-automatic n starts blastin everybody (*fans scream)

-_-

and then there was tat guy they call JJ, hu's wears the same gawd damn outfit every freakin time i see him on tv... its always that same sleeveless shirt with that same sleeveless white jacket that he wears n goes singing that same god damn song over n over again like a broken record...

if i knew the title, i'd link the youtube vid here, but i dont... but im sure most of u ching-ies would know... its that obsessivly catchy tune tats plays in every super star, super band, super campus or wadever super fucking idol thing, theres like 20 versions of it... n they play the same GAWD DAMN SONG OVER N OVER ALL THE TIME!!!

STOP IT!
NO ONE LIKES HIM!!
PICK A NEW FRIGGIN SONG ALREADY!!!~

and thats when i turned off the tv n everything went back to normal...

im sorry... i tried watchin it... i tried to understand the whole concept of ching tv, but i cant.. i really dont enjoy K-dramas or those lame taiwan gameshows.... but hey, if u ppl like it, then yeah, go ahead n watch it... i dont care, just dont make me sit thru one of those again -_-~


so yeah~
how u like THEM apples----

bliss~

the weathers' been really cool these few days... rain in the mornings and showers at night... its great isnt it? i know i love it~

u know wad else i love?
coffee in the mornings n milo at night~
yeah, n i make'em with 20 spoon fulls of sugar n sweet sweet luuvvv~

things are cool, and i feel good about wad's to come...
the future looks promising, so yeah~

music on a monday morning when the cloud block out the sun and u can still smell rain thru the gaps in ur window is just the perfect way to start the day off : )

that weird gatsby advertisment is back on again, its so gay n i dont even know wth its gotta do with the hair gel thing-_-

but wadever... things are cool~






"black hawk down, we got a black hawk down....~"

call to arms~

i have no idea why i keep wakin up in the early hours of the day, when i slept at 1am the night before.... i am exhausted, mentally... and really cranky... i think it might be due to the cigs~ i bought a pack like a couple of days ago in a moment of folly and i think its giving me this un-needed extra energy... well its not really 'energy' at all, more like, isomia inducing medication~

its makin me feel really unrested... and since i havent smoked in like.. mths, i guess the long break has nulled my resistance against tabacco~ needless to say, i dont feel the urge to smoke anymore, nor, if i did, would indefinatly reframe from succoming to it~

smoking doesnt seem cool anymore after awhile, just makes u feel sick n smell like a jet engine~ so yeah, im not going to do it anymore... maybe the occasional stick now n then, but i dont think i'll be purchasing any on my own... period~

-------------------

spent the entire morning playin 'World of Warcraft'~
woke up at 7.45am, & theres not really much to watch on tv... plus, it was great timing too cause my friend came online at that time, so we got on our mics n startin talkin crap...
yeah, that my character...


anyway, we managed to get into a great group n we all went exploring n shit.. the group was made up of Mokand( aka. Jeff ), Illucent ( aka. Robert), and Rageth ( aka. Robert's son hu's name i dont know cause he didnt talk much ) and then there was me (aka Vanden)~

i wish i could've recorded our conversations, it was hilarious... we did all sorts of stuff besides questing like goin into the Al Quhira 40-man Raid instance ( its just a really big n scary place with big monsters FYI to those hu dont play )


we killed some giant snakes...


took down a really big anubis elite...


we died plenty of times of course.. but eventually we took him down~



and a lil group photo right there~


by this time it was around 3pm and we had almost played for 7 hours straight.... n it was like 1am east coast time over at america so they needed to sleep n i needed to eat and rob's son needed to go to sch tommoro... so we went our seperate ways~

i had reached lvl 58 so i could go through the portal to 'Outlands' (an even scarier place with even more bigger monsters) so i flew to 'blasted lands' where the portal was...


rode on over... u can already see it from a distance, its pretty huge~


see wad i mean...



so i went thru it, n there was this huge battle goin on inside.. took another photo like any curious onlooker hu stumbled onto an epic battle would...


then i flew to this place called "Thrallmar" which is were u'd 1st go to went thru the portal... see that town at the top left there? yeah tats the one...


it isnt exactly the safest place to be for beginners, since theres this big ass monster called a "Fel Reaver" that wanders around right outside the encampment... i managed to take a pic of his back before he stepped on me -_-


so.. yeah.. basically that was my day and my 1st time in the "Hellfire Pennisular"~
probably meeting jeff tomoro morning... he's from Atlanta, Gerogia... so my 8am is his 10pm...

going back to sch tommoro to meet jenny for lunch, minty for dinner & gynn for supper... so at least i still keep in touch with reality~




i'm such a nerd -_-~
bahhh~

12/11/07~

annnnnd, i lost my stud today again -_-


sonofabitch~

closing time~

mom made ham n' cheese sandwiches for breakfast, i feel loved~
scent whoring with gynn the other day was cool, riddin shotgun with remi was cool too~

im happy now cause i got something to twirl around in my mouth... think thats where i get my inspiration to write from... does that even make sense? some ppl subconciously perform subtle movements with their bodies that their unaware of during intense concentration or maybe during situations that require a certain amount of focus~

be it drumming ur fingers or chewin on ur hair.. maybe its because u unknowingly do these actions that ur mind familiarizes itself as a kinda prerequisite before ur brain is able to begin thinking~

i twirl my lip stud around alot when im bored... or when i think.. i noticed that about myself alot... so, if one day, u couldnt perform these little actions that ur body's so used to doing before hand.... u find urself stumped cause u cant focus properly.... interesting huh?

well now that i DO have a twirly thinking thing to activate my brain, i guess i'll be inspired to blog more... and... think.. about stuff, not that i dont already.. think about stuff in the first place...

so yeah~

another thing i found out about myself is tat i cant live without music... i left my ipod at home the other day... n i think i died on the bus ride~

not cool -_-





*i move alot when i listen to music & i see u starin... but i keep on doing it anyway to weird u out~

take THAT ppl from the bus!

04/11/07~

i lost the my entire lip studd so now i got nothin to twirl around in my mouth n it feels weird~

hair is super short... badass-ness dropped by 50%.... on the other hand, cute lil school boy appeal increases by 70%, dont know if its a good thing, but wadever~

section 377A of the penal code says u cant have gay sex in public or in the privacy of ur own homes even if its consentual or face imprisonment for a term which may extend to 2 years~

wat gives?

i hardly think gay sex, let alone any sex thats consentual for that matter, to be the goverment's business~ dont u have better things to do then hold forums debating whether or not to let the homos get it on~

ppl are dying n shit, n u wanna discuss whether sodomy is legal?
well fuck u then..

homosexuality isnt really a choice, its genetic... gay ppl cant help being gay, its in their genes, so its not like they can help it that their not straight.. what 2 ppl do btw themselves, be it within the legal limits of the law, is their own progative n NONE OF THE GOVERMENT'S BUSINESS -_-

leave them alone jesus christ~

its such a stupid law n i cant believe its been made such a big deal-_-
n im not gay or anything.. everyone thinks if u give ur consent to the matter, ur a fag..

Come onnnn -_- are u pricks tat childish n narrow-minded?
"heyyy dont donate to the SPCA, cause if u do, tat means u like animals n u wanna have sex with them"

im not gay, i like girLs.. n girLs like me~

ducky loves bunny..
well more like the other way... isnt it?




pfft~

ducky~

"my turn, not ur turn! i wanna push the button~"
duckies are cute : )

hallow's end~

2 groups of people from the media came to the restarunt last night... some suprize visit to like, evaluate the food i think~ anyway, we had to treat them like kings which kinda sucked cause there was this other customer hu had to wait like 30 min for one of my supervisors to flambe her ice-cream~

but at least one of the tables were nice ppl... the other seemed pretty arrogant~ so, i was clearin up their plates, n made a lil small talk with them... which ended up me tellin them my whole quitin sch n wanting to go into mass comm story... and coincidently one of them happended to be the VP of a publication industry.

so after talkin a lil more, i took a long shot n asked if there were any internships available, n she gave me her namecard n told her to email her~

so yeah... im feelin pretty good : )
i lost the ball part of my lip stud, so now i gotta use the spike one which is kinda big so i cant twirl it around as much... but i'm still feelin good~

my best bud's bday is today.... but non of the girls could make it so i guess we'd celebrate it on the weekends~ pay comes next week... so kudos to that~

n yeah.. its been a cool day... nice weather, no one home to bug me.. the sister's goin to las vegas in a couple of weeks so she wont harrass me for a while~

i've got quite a bunch of stuff to do, n havent really had alot of sleep... but i'm feelin good, nontheless~

"I’m lost without u
Can’t help myself
How does it feel
To know that I love u baby~"

wad a stupid song...tsk -_-


lalalala~ : )

28/10/07~

been real busy with work n other stuff... but im havin fun... feel really independent doing wadever the f i want now that im not in sch... it kinda forces u to be an adult n make the right decisions for urself~

gettin my pay soon, then its off to get my cardigan with jf~ (cause she's my favourite)

i wish i was a journalist, or a radio DJ.. cause i have a sexy ass voice n everyone knows it : ) gonna try n get an internship with mediacorp just for kicks during this "happy hour" period~

i dunno if i should work tomoro... i dont really have any plans but i feel like hangin out -_- think i'll go cut my hair or something... blah~

chiefs at chinese restarants listen to techno when they cook...
chiefs at my work place listen to Pussycat Dolls n Carlos Santana...





kudos~

happy hour~

im tired.... work's been a bitch.. started at 10am & ended in the evening... being a waiter is cool n all, but i feel as though im not really doing something im good at...

being in the F&B line is really strict, customers have expectations and everyone wants to be pleased~ im such a laidback person, i dont see wad the importance of having such high standards is for, i mean, its difficult for me to treat a V.I.P with any more recognition then the next joe...

i hate discrimination in any form be it race, religion, or in this case, ur finanical status.... doesnt mean ur a rich-ass means ur the boss of me... but everyone around here seems to think so... n that bothers me~

i spend more time talkin with customers than i do serving food... n some of them are cool~ im pretty random, many of u know that, so i can start a conversation really well sometimes.. n i enjoy it, no one really takes the time to talk to u when ur having a meal... its always just business, u come in, u eat, u leave~

wad ever happened to having 3 hour lunches where everyone at the table just talked n shit~ i luv that.... lunch used to be sacred, now its just a proceedure... well fuck that~

had dinner at huda's place... her grandma cooks the best malay food in the world :) we talked n chilled... it was lovely~
i could see ourselves doing the same thing in 30 years, just sitting down having dinner, talkin about stuff... lovely : )

this is, happy hour for me... the time after something bad's happened ( dropping out from sch, bad job... ) just before something good (new beginnings, better life..)

i know things are goin to be fine, i know they dont seem to be fine now, but things have a way of working themselves out given the approriate time.... that we should stop n smell the friggin roses once in awhile for christ sake~

probably meeting the guys tomoro for dinner at ct hall after work....
we'd all be dressed up in our formal wear, it'd be cool.. like business men off to get a drink at a bar after work~

right, tired...
ciao~

artsy fartsy~

finally, went to the singapore art's museum with huiting... it was uber cool... so many stuff to see~






then we wrote our names on some tiger thingy... dont know wad its for but they had crayons there so yeah... had to vandalize it~


lots of cam-whoring.. its kinda fun, i understand why chicks love to do it.. but most of the pics of me are fugly so im not gonna post them~


went to coffee bean to chill... chatted for like 3 hrs i think... it was cool: ) i ordered some fruity tooty mango tea shit which cost like $7 dollars... yeah.. never buy anything tats not coffee in coffee bean, its a total rip off~


& i dont think this picture looks gay at all... its a totally manly position my hands are at so i dont get it... DAMN my korean-ish looks n white+fair complexion! u think its a compliment but korean guys look faggoty -.-


went to town, chilled somemore... walked around a bit.. then headed home, met mom for dinner.. which is a rare, since i hardly ever do that... n mom was so happy -_- but she kept giving me her pet talks on how im suppose to plan my future now that im not in sch anymore n wad not...

n she thinks my shag band is some gang insignia or something... my mom is so innocently cute~ pfft...

cant stop smiling today :) :) :)
right thats it then.. ciao~

army beckons~

i've been askin my friends who been thru or are still in the army if theres anything i should be prepared for....

1. wear boxers or pants during the medical check-up or u'd be walkin around in ur undies in a room full of guys which would be extremly gay~

the proceedure apparently involves u showing ur wee wee to some guy then coughing once-_-.. dont even ask... its a medical thing... guess they gotta check if ur dick's there.. cant join the army if u got no pecker now can u~

sidetracking here for a min....
these guys that... check ur dicks.... these "dick inspectors" if u will...
its a real profession~

.........
.....
...

"hi... im alfred.... im a dick inspector : ) "

2. hope u dont get assigned to school no.1 (wadever that means....) cause its furthest away from the ferry terminal and apparently, its the most haunted one~

i only got 2 tips so far... other "what not to do in the army" tips are pretty self-explanatory..

-dont piss on the trees at night
-dont point ur flashlight at the trees at night
-dont kick the trees at night
-dont sleep under the trees at night
-dont shoot at the trees at night

cause everyone knows that the ghosts live in the trees and if u piss on their homes, they're gonna bite ur dick off~

but thats kinda the least of my problems, im more worried about wad job i get posted to... i really hope its some deskjob from 9-5 n all i do is answer acouple of calls n key in some entries... n because of my tatt i cant join the police force, which sucks since its the most slack one so i gotta be the marine~

im so gonna die there....



sonofabitch -_-

minorites~

chillin at starbucks today made us realise how different we are from everyone else... eventhough we were all born in the same country, we had different influences which contributed to our different interests n personalities...

now, thats cool n all...
but personalities aside, we've adapted a completly different outlook on our way of life... n its because of this difference that we cant really relate to many people of this society~

its a mystery how we survived these 3 years of poly... i felt i could never really connect with the ppl in engineering... n i didnt really understand it either~ edd pointed out that if we had changed n gotten into the whole "singaporean teenager
persona, that if we had learned to like the things they liked or did the things they did... then yeah, maybe we'd have more friends, things might've been easier & life wouldnt seem as typical as we thought it was...

i think that we live in a society where we can't really BE who we are... we have to choose a "side" be it the Pool & Dota players, the emo-people, the clubbers or the ching-chong-changs... u cant just be 'that guy' anymore.. gotta be "special"~

things might have been easier if we'd adapted n changed with the majority... but, compromising what defines u for society just isnt wad its about... n im glad we didnt~

sure it sucks being the so called 'minorities' in terms of... uhh... lets classify it as, being the "typical singaporean"... its been difficult not being about to relate to strangers n all... but i dont regret being who i am... we're not the weird ones.. everyone else is... im sure once we move outta this place ( n im sure we all will.. hopefully) we'd fit in better else where, where ever it may be~

then when u guys go there, u'd know how it feels... when ppl talk of politics or give references to historical analoges, u'd be like..
"hey did u catch last night's 'hey gorgeous'? on channel U?"
"umm... no -.-"

so yeah, screw all of u~


*bring back the good ol'days when they'd use to beat up ppl hu for speakin mandarin~

"ni hao"
"what the hell did u just say?"
"sher mer?"

*Punch~

"DUI BU QI!.. urrr.. I MEAN... IM SORRY!"


*Punch~

dear student~

Withdrawal From Course Of Study

We refer to your notification of withdrawal from the Diploma in Mechatronics (full-time) course.

Please note that your withdrawal is granted with effect from 17 Oct 2007.

We wish you all the best in your future endeavours.

Yours faithfully
(Person from the One-Stop Center)



.............................
......................
.................
...........
....




well LAA DEE DAAA~


legs hurt...
goin to bed...
never speaking to meanies hu dont reply msgs n fugly toy animals....





BEH -_-

in fair verona~

i had a bad case of food poisoning yesterday... kept throwin up alot.. not cool~ it was really gross actually... n because of all the puking, ididnt really eat much... so i was just puking water -_-

anyway, that was yesterday, n i feel better now... still a lil groggy but its all good~ plus, i slept for like 13hrs the entire day so im alert now, feelin really weak but all in all, everything's cool~

passed the time reading alot of the novels n online references to literature.. mainly shakespeare's... n i must say, i am truly impressed... its incredible how such artistic forms of literary works can be created back in the 16th century~ its so profound and alluring on its own, but to actually understand the meaning behind the fancy words...

i mean, wow...
its literally art in the form of words~

i used to read his plays n sonnets cause the words seemed "sexy", but to actually study the writing indepth n understanding the interpretation will blow ur mind.... i just cant believe how a man can create such magnificent compositions~

i downloaded the 1996 William Shakespeare's Romeo+Juliet by Baz Lurhrmann ( the one with Leonardo Dicaprio & Claire Danes) just for old time sake... after like 2 hrs i clicked the preview button & turns out it was dubbed in French -_- so i downloaded another one n watched it...

the 1st time i watched it was back in 2000 when they first premiered it on Channel 5... i didnt really get it then~ i thought that the words they were saying were just made up by the script writers.. so then i went n borrowed the actual R & J from the lib n found out it wasnt made up, it was taken from the actual script written 400 years ago...

so now, watching it for a second time, its more appealing then before since i'm more familiar with the story n other details in the movie... It was a brilliant adaptation of R&J set in modern times where guns where used instead of swords & cars instead of steeds... n i must say, Lurhrmann did a great job in maintaining the originality of the movie. he managed to adjust the story into a modern day scene, using subtle references from the original play n incorporate them into the movie in a different form to make it more eccentric but still maintain its authenticity~

whenever your free or got nothin better to do, go wiki the whole romeo & juliet story, read it up... learn about the individual characters & certain significant events (like the famous balcony scene).... then go watch this movie again~

its not simply a story about love....
its a story about love at first sight, forbidden passion, freedom of devotion, prejudicial injustice & tragic ignorance~

not to mention how hot claire danes was in that angel outfit of her's : )

its really a beautiful thing.... n to have an appreciation for this stuff is truly self-satisfying~





"Did my heart love till now?
Forswear it sight,
For I never saw true beauty till this night~"

-Romeo+Juliet



couldn't end without quoting something from the movie now can i : )
cheers~

Set Text For Examination In 2009~

Literature in English
Paper1 : Reading Literature

Section A: Poems

Section B: Prose
Jane Austen: Pride and Prejudice
Charles Dickens: Great Expectation

Section C: Drama
William Shakespeare: Othello
Oscar Wilde: The Importance of Being Earnest

Paper4:Imagining Other Worlds
-Edgar Allan Poe: The Fall of the House of Usher and Other Writings, Poems, Tales, Essays and Reviews (Penguin Classics)
-Samuel Taylor Coleridge: Selected Poems
-Aldous Huxley: Brave New World
-George Orwell: 1984
-Anthony Burgess: A Clockwork Orange
-Margaret Atwood: The Handmaid’s Tale
-William Shakespeare: The Tempest
-Christopher Marlowe: Dr Faustus (Mermaid edition)
-Charlotte Perkins Gilman: Herland

Selected Poems:
-Stanzas
-Romance
-The City in the Sea
-The Sleeper
-The Valley of Unrest
-The Raven
-Ulalume
-For Annie
-Annabel Lee
-Eldorado

Selected Tales:
-MS Found in a Bottle
-Ligeia
-The Fall of the House of Usher
-The Murders in the Rue Morgue
-The Oval Portrait
-The Masque of the Red Death
-The Pit and the Pendulum
-Hop-Frog

Selected Essays:
-On Imagination
-Time and Space
-The Veil of the Soul

**********************************

dont get me started on the history paper -_-
super busy now...

right, off to work~




Keane is the best band in the world... period~

10/10/07~

done alot of thinkin about stuff, n i've decided that i would wanna take A-levels during the army part time so wen i get out, i'd be able to study @ SIM n get a degree in mass comm... either that or go to NAFA~

either way i still wanna do the A-levels, n hearing from andrew.. its not a walk in the park~ i checked out the website n there's a wide variety of examinable subjects... from different languages like French and Arabic.. to the weird stuff like bible studies~ Then there are the normal ones like math, and economics...

i gotta take at least 4 papers (including the General Paper)
so i think i'll go for English Literature, Modern European History and the last one being chinese B... which is probably the one im most worried about but according to andrew, it's a sort of "unwritten" requirement if u wanna work in sg... well, not that i wanna work in sg.. this place is horrible~ but the point being, i cant even count to 10 in manadrin so i dunno...

went to the lib n borrowed a shit load of books on shakespeare... i wanna get a head start on this so... yeah~ it really interesting if u actually understand "Old English"~

got a call from jenny askin me if i could work later, it was pretty last min but i went anyway.... they had a wedding goin on, didnt have to do much just clear the plates... made alot of new friends... it was cool~ one guy asked if i was an "english helicopter" n i said "yeah~"

then he asked if i was from mass comm n i was like... "umm no... engineering -_-" thats like the 100th time someone thinks im from mass comm, which sucks cause im not.. but i wanna be... then he saids "ohh cause u have such a slang, reminds me of a DJ"..... that would also be the 100th time someone said that to me -_-

i like how english oriented i am.... but i live in such a chinese oriented world.... n i really envy those hu are bilingual.... makes me wonder if i should start learning mandarin... actually i tired tat once, kept talkin to my friends in chinese but they all scolded me n forbid me to speak like that cause it was weirding them out~

but wadever... i like the way i am, hope i get into a good sch, hope i earn a ton of money.. then i'll fly to boston n never come back~

note to self: never buy those packets of self-rolling tabacco.... sure its cheap, but it takes 30 mins to roll one friggin joint not to mention it tastes like shit n makes u smell like an drunk old person... plus its not exactly the kind of stuff u'd bring outdoors to smoke since its so flimsy to hold~




its stuff like this that make u wanna quit smoking u know...
jeezz.... -_-





Note to self #2: gotta learn to juggle too~

bad cartoons=stupid kids~

i was lying in my bed this morning when suddenly it hit me why kids these days are so stupid.... it wasnt cause of the bad parenting or the crap they teach u in schools... well maybe it is, but the Main cause of this mass stupidity in the kids is cause of all the stupid cartoon show's their playin on tv~

one cartoon in particular being the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles...
awesome show back in the day when it 1st came out in 1987. it had great character development, a good plot that had an evil villian, monsters and robots... basically it was a cool show, n kids liked it... it was witty and funny and had plenty of ass kicking in it as well~

lets look at the characters.... there's 4 mutant turtles all named after famous renaissance artists hu learn ninja from a kung fu master hu got turned into a rat to prevent an evil bad guy named after a kitchen appliance and a brain in a man-robot suit from bringing this big ball-like tank called the technodrome to the surface n destroy the world~

the characteristics of the turtles where both unique and were wad every cartoon super team from then on needed... hot headed rebel, the easy-going goof, the wise & cautious leader, and a science geek~

Raphael: the "Wolverine" of the group, he's the reckless badass that does wadever the hell he wants n doesnt take shit from nobody... he's probably the strongest one of the 4, but his rage often clouds his judgement n gets him into more even more trouble then b4... plus he's the only one cool enough to get his own turtle bike while everyone else rides in the van~

Michaelangelo: the free spirited surfer dude... arguably the coolest turtle of the lot... he uses alot of slangs and was the one that made pizzas look cool... he fightscenes are comical but effective, like the fights u see in a jackie chan movie... plus that "cowabunga" phrase he uses all the time, wad does it even mean?

i went n googled it, n apparently it was a catch phrase used by surfers meaning "to ride the waves"~ bet u didnt know that DID U... bet u went round yellin " COWABUNGA!!" to all ur friends when u were a kid n not even know wth it ment DIDNT U!~

Donatello: the tech wiz, he's the intellectual one of the group, u always see him messin around with chemicals or fixin some machinary while mikey's eatin his pizza, leo's training with splinter and raph is watchin tv~ he's the one that builds the weapon to destroy the bad guy of that episode when the time calls for it... he's also the one that pimped out the turtle van with missles n shit... which, i have no idea where they got the missles from in the 1st place~ plus, everytime the turtles are trapped or corner by the bad guys, he'd always manage to pull out some fancy gizmo from his ass to save the day... kudos~

Leonardo: the leader... he's the serious one, always thinking of his fellow brothers before himself... the father figure i guess... always following the rules n doing the honorable thing... he'd probably be the most boring one of them all if not for the 2 big ass katana's he weilds~ he's swordsmenship is uncanny and matched with his smarts and training produces a deadly combination of wit and skill~

then there was splinter and April O'neil, they were the other main characters in the show...
Splinter's just a rat, nothing much there....
April on the other hand was this super hot channel 6 news reporter with her orange jumpsuit and red hair running around with her camera n that dorky cameraman who's name i cant remember...

anyway, tat was the 1987 version of the cartoon show.. and it was the best version of the TMNT~


then in 1997, there was "Ninja Turtles: The Next Mutation" this one wasnt really a cartoon, it was set in the real world...


so it was 4 guys in turtle suits.. this concept followed the 1990 TMNT movie... they even had a 5th female turtle which was uber lame.. i dunno wad the producers were thinkin~

then came the 2003 version of the TMNT cartoon where it showed the turtles in a more darker way...


they were more violent n a tad too much robotics like laser guns n stuff, which totally lost that jackie chan-ness appeal... what i hated about this series was they completely screwed up the original plot... yes, there was a shredder n a krang.. but they made shredder into this billionaire darth vader character hu kept sending his minions to rob banks n shit instead of taking over the world... and krang didnt turn up till the later part of the show where he was just shown as some normal everyday episode bad guy-_-

no foot soliders, no beebop n rocksteady, no technodrome... instead there were voodoo dragons and mystical ninja tournements were splinter was actually one of the champion fighters back in the day... COME ON! -_-

but hey, at least they had a shredder and a Krang.. even though they werent properly developed... apparently kids just wanted to see more action n lasers n shit -_-

the last straw was when they came out with "TMNT-Fast Forward"...
omg~ now the entire plot had gone to shit... the whole legacy of the TMNT, from being the cool, lovable, ass-kickin creatures to the stupid futuristic light-sabre weilding, laser blasting, alien-fighting sellouts they are now....

MUST EVERY CARTOON REMAKE END UP BEING A SELL OUT TO THE TYPICAL STEROTYPING OF THE WHOLE ROBOTS N TIME TRAVELING FUTURISTIC BULL CRAP WE SEE IN EVERY SATURDAY MORNING CARTOON SHOWN ON TV???!!!!


look at that.. i dont even know hu that boy in the middle is... where the hell did April go?! n how the FUCK could they live so long?! a lifespan of a turtle is an about 100 years old, not a fuckin millenium! even so, they wont be called TEENAGE muntant ninja turtles.. they just be called mutant ninja turtles.... so wad gives??



u know why kids are getting so retarded these days?
i'll tell u why....

its cause the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles went GAY, thats why~

im just really cranky cause my ipod's screen's a lil messed up n i cant read the song titles....







dont judge me-_-~

shut up~

sure our forefathers came from malaysia and china... but after the British conlonised the place, u'd think the people would've learnt to speak friggin english by now...-_-

the other day there was this charity guy hu came up to me and started rambling in chinese and broken english to me to donate money to save the sick kids or wadever the F he was saying....

anyway, this is wad i remember about the conversation...

weirdo: "excute me, da rao ni yi xia.... blah blah blah... sick kids dying... blah blah blah... every cent helps.... *chinese ramblings... give us ur money..."

me: "wad?"

weirdo: "this is a real charity organization, not the cheat ppl kind one..."

me: "wad...?" -_-

weirdo: "bang bang mang.... *more chinese ramblings.... blah blah... NKF... blah blah blah... i like little boys.. blah blah blah... donate now or die..."

me: "umm... go fuck urself"
*walks off~

wad kinda fucked up half chinese, half singlish poopy monkey language are ppl conversing with nowadays-_- the hell are they teaching u in school for god sakes~ dont u people know ur making no F-ing sense when u talk like tat? wad, u think its cool or something? well fuck u then....

im not saying that their stupid or something, hell im not exactly the smartest person in the world either... im sure that all u poopy monkey speaking ppl come from good school's n get As for everything... but intellegence is often associated with ur ability to be articulate in ur speech n conversation skills.... so if u decide to sound like a moron, ppl are gonna generally assume u are one~

THEN WHY THE HELL IS EVERYONE IN THIS COUNTRY TALKIN LIKE TAT!?!?~

i have no beef with the chinese language, i know ppl hu are fluent in mandarin and though i have no idea wad their talkin about sometimes, i can tell the person their talkin to understands wad the other is saying... and isnt tat wad its all about? being able to understand wad the Fuck ur saying?

please, citizens of this effing country, i implore u all.... speak goood english... u dont have to sound like an englishman, just speak coherent, comprehensible, simple, hell... perhaps UNDERSTANDABLE english-_-... & if u cant then i sugguest u get the fuck out of the country n move to stupid'svile where they speak poopy monkey very fluently-_-

"arlow, wa seh.. u beri the cute worx =}} wan to be frienndzzz? xX>_<@@@"





you gotta be shiitting me -_-

bad ju ju~

so much has been goin on, theres alot on my mind... i would've lost it if not for the conversations with huda n vic so thanks alot~

shit happens... but life goes on... just gotta deal with it cause thats the way the world works~

we have the right to feel sad and theres nothing wrong about feeling the way u feel even if the situation doesnt call for it... emotion isn't something u can control... so, we deal with it... in wadever way we see fit~

we cry, we scream into a pillow, we drink, we have sex, we talk... but we deal with it nontheless... and it makes us feel better~ Thats all we really need, just to.. feel better about ourselves and prepare us for wad's to come... theres nothing wrong with that~

and it does make u stronger, it does make u a better person... u understand things better, and u know how others feel hu have gone thru wad ur going thru.. and u know ur not alone...

the results came back not too long ago, & even though i passed my retake subject and wont be kicked outta sch, i've decided that it would be wiser to drop out instead, get thru with the army then come back n study design or mass comm or something... then once i save enough money, im moving to australia n im never coming back~ at least the ppl there are nice n they speak friggin ENGLISH... 80% of ppl here cant seem to do it here-_-

anyway, im cool now... about everything... i was sad, then pissed, then sad again.... but now im cool so its all good~ dont know if things will be fine, but at least i'll be ready for it... i think....

went grocery shoppin n got a bottle of wine and some blue cheese... mom says it tastes like shit, but my sister n i like it... its got a very sophisticated taste of sweetness from the wine n texture from the cheese... very refine indeed~ its something u'd either like, or wont... just like caviar or those snails that the french eat at cocktail parties~

makes me feel like royalty everytime i take a sip, just luv it :)

a friend of mine's mother's in her final stage of cancer... im not exactly a big fan of god, but im gonna pray for them~

this month has just been filled with so much bad ju ju..... i think its time they stopped...
u think u can do that mr god? -_-~






*escargots... an edible snail prepared as an appetizer or entrée~

(no title for this one...)~

something bad happened to the father the other day...

neighbour's kids banged on the front door yesterday morning when i was asleep... said something bad happened to the father... i didnt get wad they were saying but they just told me to follow them, so i did~

went to the lift landing and saw him on the ground... there was blood on the floor & a knife was next to him... those were the first things i noticed... they were first things everyone there noticed~

i bent down and placed my hand on his head... he was sweating.... i asked if he was alright, if he could hear me... he didnt ans~ his eyes were rolled back and his left hand was placed over his heart, covering the wound... some guy there told me the medics were on the way... he had his kid with him... i asked him wad time he called it in...

"9.20, they'll be comming sooon"
it was 9.25am....
"bring ur kid inside man, he doesnt need to see this..."

i looked around alot.. started noticing everything i could see... his wallet was by the stairwell... the bloodied knife... the people around me just standing there afraid to "mess up" the scene... i took note of everything for when the cops got here~

kept on talking to him, kept saying everything would be fine, tat the medics were on the way... i just kept talking to him, i needed him to be able to hear me not understand me... i just kept talking...

went inside the house to get a pillow to rest his head on.... his eyes were still rolled back~

"where the hell are the medics..."

they finally came, took them long enough-_-... they took the father away.... not before fumbling alot...it was like their first time seeing blood, it was so unprofessional, almost comical~ the first cop came while the medics had him strapped in the stretcher... started questioning the ppl around... then they started questioning me~

my mom came just after the father was taken away... cops told her they took him to changi general, so she took a cab there while i stayed... they needed to qs me more~

more cops came... wrapped the area around it with Police tape... kept talkin on their phones and radios for more back up~ they told me the investigators were arriving soon, so i waited.....

i think 30 mins had passed... a crazy old neighbour from upstairs happened to walk down n saw the mess... started being unmannered and disrespectful towards me and the cops, saying how "back in the day" there were cops on every street n other ramblings of alonely old man just trying to seek attention... on any other day i would just ignore him, this wasnt any other day, so i lashed at him... cops told me to go back home.... they'll call me once the investigators came... crazy old man went back upstairs as well~

i took a quick bath... it helped cool me off~ cops knocked on my door a min later, i let them in... CID lady took my statement and made me check it a few times before heading back out to the crime scene...

by now the place was swarmed with cops all doing their CSI-thing.. taking samples of blood, photos, etc~ they told me to go back n wait, they'd let me know if they needed to ask any more questions...

i went back into the house, took a cig from my dad's room and lit it... then i just sat in the living room... i wanted to turn on the tv, but i didnt... i mean, u shouldnt right? now's hardly the time to wanna watch tv~ so i just sat there...

after about 20 mins, i turned on my computer... it felt so wrong to do so... i figured i should be emoing at a corner of crying in the bathroom or something... but instead i was checkin my e-mails and watched videos from you-tube~

it felt wrong...
but, i felt no remorse~

my father's an asshole... he's never made any positive impact in my life cept to screw me n my family over countless times... i've always known this was bound to happen... it would be karma.. & he would've gotten wad was comming to him~ i have sympathy but no empathy to wad happened to him, and i feel no remorse~



* i dont think i should carry on writing this anymore, i believe it would be rather disturbing if i were to write how i honest felt....

its been quite a personal dilema whether or not i should post this entry due to its personal content, but i decided to do it anyway~





i feel myself loosing my humanity~
on the other hand, i dont really feeel anything at all...



im soo gonna burn in hell~

no speak espanol?~

"buenas noches~"
said the mexican salesman to the little boy...

"woould youu likeee to buyyy a sombrero for 10 pesos lil boy?"

"wad use would i have for a sombrero? "
asked the little boy...

"the weather here is veryy hot, a hat this big would protect you from the sun's rays and keep u warm when you go harvesting in the fields~"

"no Señor, it is winter, the sun is no where to be seen... i have no use for it now.."
replied the little boy...

"wooould u likeee to buyy some arabica coffee beans for 20 pesos lil boy?"

"wad use would i have for a arabica coffee beans ? "
asked the little boy...

"these are the finest coffee beans in all of latin america, plant them by your father's yield and they will grow effortlessly through the winter~"

"no Señor, the lakes are frozen, no water runs through the fields anymore.. i have no use for them now..."
replied the little boy....

the mexican salesman rumaged through his bag of wears, pulling out items one by one... but the little boy seemed interested in nothing. He looked at his the animal pulling his cart and asked the little boy......

"wooould u likeee to buyy this donkey for 50 pesos lil boy?"

"wad use would i have for a donkey? "
asked the little boy...

"he could carry your wares from town to town, it's hooves tread firmly through the thick snow & requires little to drink~"

"no Señor, the townsfolk have moved to the inner city for warmth and supplies for the coming winter.... i have no use for it now..."
replied the boy...

the mexican salesman looked at the boy with dismal....
"i have nothing left to offer u lil boy, i'd best be off... adios~"

he climbed into his wooden cart, tugged gently on the leash & rod off following the road to the next village.

the little boy stood alone in the cold until only fog n mist enshrouded the caravan and all could be heard were the sound of hooves trotting in the distance~

he placed his hands into his pockets and stumbled back indoors.....


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(gawd~ i have no idea wad the hell im writing about anymore -_-....)